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My Interior Monologue: Damnit this wisdom tooth is coming in back there, kinda sore. Maybe I should go to the dentist... NO! Can't admit to yourself you have wisdom teeth - that means you're old! Sure some people get their wisdom teeth when they're like 20, but some people become Norwood 7 freaks when they're 20 too! Wisdom teeth = old. Must stay young. Ignore the soreness. Just pay attention to your youthful teeth. Do I still have any baby teeth in there? Probably not - but as long as I don't acknowledge the wisdom teeth and stay below Norwood 2 I'll still be young... Ow! Should probably gChat KevCops about this issue
Country Club Member: Hey I saw you put out Kris's Mix-Up, that Half-Lemonade Half-Iced Tea drink
Snapple CEO's Inner Monologue: Dear God I hope he doesn't mention Arnold Palmers. No one mention Arnold Palmers!
Snapple CEO: Oh yeah - Kris, Kris Mains - she's in our R&D Department. One day she accidentally mixed a batch of our Iced Tea with our Lemonade, and well we thought that combo tasted so good we should make it a new Snapple flavor!
Country Club Member: Uh-huh, uh-huh, very exciting. The only thing is this club's been serving half-lemonade, half-iced teas - you know, Arnold Palmers - for years. You must've had one before Kris had her little mix-up?
Snapple CEO's Inner Monologue: Why did I come here - here, ground zero for Arnold Palmers?! Did I need to play golf that badly? I gotta lie low for a while 'till this whole thing dies down
Snapple CEO: Arnold... Palmer. Like the golfer? He has a half-lemonade half-iced tea drink named after him, and they serve it here?
Country Club Member: I mean Juan at the bar is always pushing it on members in the summer - it's his specialty, he has a secret ratio of lemonade to iced tea. I can't believe he hasn't served you one. Hold on a second - JUAN?
Snapple CEO's Inner Monologue: If Juan comes over here I'm a dead man. I practically lived on Arnold Palmers the whole summer of '92
Snapple CEO [getting up]: Oooh you know what I'm a little rusty I gotta hit the range before the first tee. See you around, buddy
Country Club Member: Wait, Juan's coming!
[Snapple CEO rushes out the door]
Snapple CEO's Inner Monologue: Phew, that was close. I can't take this kind of pressure - I'm gonna have to scrap the plans for that Hot Toddy rip-off "Brenda's Boozy Brew"
