My 2 cents on James Brown

Much of the MSM has focused on the African-American community's mourning of "The Godfather of Soul" James Brown. But as I see it, the community that really cared most about James Brown was definitely the Summer Camp Highlights Video Montage Editor community.

Now, every time these Summer Camp Highlights Video Montage editors play "I Feel Good" on the soundtrack over shots of really fat and really scrawny kids playing in the pool and then a fat kid dancing, after having just had shots of athletic kids playing baseball with "Put Me In Coach" on the soundtrack, they will always shed a tear. Let's just hope John Fogerty holds on to dear life, for the Summer camp montage editors' sake.


p.s. This post came to me in a dream. AG and Tom were there, and they laughed, so I figure it's good, right?

More Gerald Ford content

"After he graduated in 1935 from the University of Michigan, he had offers to play professional football for either the Detroit Lions or the Green Bay Packers. Mr. Ford remained fascinated with sports, but he chose the law, a subject that had appealed to him since high school. He enrolled at Yale Law School." From Gerald Ford's obituary in the NYTimes

I haven't talked to Tom today but I imagine he read that paragraph and is now saying, "You go play football, Gerry. You go, enjoy it, it'll be great fun. Law school, schlaw school- this is the NBA- i mean NFL- we're talking about here!" despite the fact that Ford is now dead and in any case wouldn't have been competing with him to get into Yale Law.

p.s. check out the Ford SNL skit posted over at marquis

Apartment Mixer

I figured I moved into a new place, why not have a Mixer! Meet the neighbors, have a few drinks before the New Year. Well, my plans haven't turned out so well. Maybe I'll postpone it until 2007 when I can retool it. See the results of my eVite for yourselves.

The Hanukkah Song (Blog Remix)

Put on your yarmulke, here comes Hanukkah
Its so much fun-ukkah to celebrate Hanukkah,

When you feel like the only kid in town without a Christmas tree,
here’s a list of Bloggers who are Jewish, just like you and meeeeee:

Dan from Delino, lights the menorah,
So does his brother Rich, though he can’t read the Torah

Guess who eats pastrami at Gour-met Heaven,
Actual God, That Girl, and President Richard Levin

Lester’s half Jewish; Kingspawn’s a quarter too,
Put them together--what a fine lookin’ Jew!

We got Er-ic,
And his bro-ther Sa-noj,
And I think Mulatto Jesus,
But no one really knowwwws.

Nostradamus -- wouldn’t be killed in a pogrom.
But guess who would… Delino’s own To-m!
It’s true- he converted!

So many Jews are in the Blogging biz--
Actual Rod isn’t, he writes about Is----rael.

You can eat latkes with Beneficent All-ah,
Or eat a million dollars with Delino blogger Al – ahhhh!

So while Andrew Sullivan is curled up, next to his Christmas tree,
Gather ‘round the menorah with Finnegan and Jer-e-myyyy!

So smoke your join-ukkah, and snort your Rital-anukkah,
If you really, really wanna-kah, have a happy, happy, happy, happy
Hanukkahhhh!

Ice Breaker

So Tom invited me to an art exhibit opening at a sophisticated gallery in the Meatpacking District on Saturday. He neglected to tell me that everyone there would be dressed up in practically black tie attire, with fashion-forward style to boot. So there I was, wearing jeans and sneakers at this fancy party, surrounded by sophisticates from the art world. Fortunately, I thought of a clever way to shoehorn myself into a conversation:

Male Sophisticate: I love this piece, it's so provocative.

Female Sophisticate: I know, I mean it says a lot about women's role in society and the burdens we have to bear.

Male Sophisticate: And look at the colors. That blue is so deep.

Me: Hey guys, so who are you supporting in the 2008 Republican primary? I'm leaning toward Mitt Romney myself.

Seen in the Window at Macy's

When Tom and I walked past the window at Macy's this weekend, we noticed they'd tried a new theme for this year's Christmas season. That's right, they made an Inherit the Wind diorama! According to Tom, who saw the play with his parents while they were in New York for an AIPAC conference, the scene depicted in the diorama is this one- take a look for yourself:

Matthew Harrison Brady: We must not abandon faith! Faith is the most important thing!
Henry Drummond: Then why did God plague us with the capacity to think? Mr. Brady, why do you deny the one thing that sets us above the other animals? What other merit have we? The elephant is larger, the horse stronger and swifter, the butterfly more beautiful, the mosquito more prolific, even the sponge is more durable. Or does a sponge think?
Matthew Harrison Brady: I don't know. I'm a man, not a sponge!
Henry Drummond: Do you think a sponge thinks?
Matthew Harrison Brady: If the Lord wishes a sponge to think, it thinks!
Henry Drummond: Does a man have the same privilege as a sponge?
Matthew Harrison Brady: Of course!
Henry Drummond: [Gesturing towards the defendant, schoolteacher Bertram Cates] Then this man wishes to have the same privilege of a sponge, he wishes to think!

New Haven Coliseum Implosion Pending

From that paragon of journalistic excellence, the New Haven Register. Here is how the Register describes experience of the Staniewiczes, who won the lottery to push the plunger to implode the Coliseum:


The lucky winners, as chance would have it, are siblings Ben and Tori Staniewicz, 9 and 7, respectively, of Guilford. Their father, Jim Staniewicz, 48, of West Haven, drew the winning ticket from among 453 who participated, but decided his kids would get a bigger kick out of doing the deed.


"You never think you’re going to win," Staniewicz said. "I’m that proverbial guy."

Staniewicz, an engineer with the New Haven Parking Authority, fondly recalls the many Nighthawks hockey games and rock concerts at the Coliseum. The most memorable was Bruce Springsteen, Staniewicz said, though Jethro Tull and the Beach Boys weren’t too shabby either.

"We all had good memories there, and it’s sad to say goodbye to ... a building that brought so much fun and enjoyment to so many people," he said. "Now in its final hour, it’s going to be one final performance and we’ve looking forward to being part of that big bang."

Ben went to a Ringling Bros. circus at the Coliseum years ago, but doesn’t remember it. Nonetheless, he’s looking forward to blowing the arena into history books next year.

"It’s gonna be cool," Ben said.

The OTHER War

Can we please stop it this holiday season with the "War on Christmas" bullshit from O'Reilly and his acolytes. In most stores I enter I'm bombarded by "White Christmas" or "Noel, Noel" or some other tripe.

I'd like to talk to my dear blog readers about a real, pressing problem. And that is the WAR ON UDAY HUSSEIN'S HALF-BIRTHDAY, or the WOUHHB. As we all know, Uday Saddam Hussein al-Tikriti was brought into this world on the glorious day of June 18, 1964. And that is why traditionally, we celebrate Uday Hussein's Half-Birthday on December 18 of every year.

For many years, the beginning of the "Uday Hussein's Half-Birthday Season" had been getting pushed back farther and farther into November. Some, myself included, even said the holiday was becoming too crassly commercial- I mean this is about celebrating six months after the birth of the Little Baby Lamb of Iraq, not video iPods. But with Uday's untimely death in 2003, the holiday took on a new significance, and was really making headway in returning to its roots.
Yet in the last year or so, we've seen a disturbing backlash against Uday's half birthday-- the WOUHHB as I call it.

Folks, ya see the time was, a decent, God-fearing American family could walk into a department store and be treated to the sounds of "Uday's Half-Birthday Wonderland," "Have Yourself A Merry Little Uday's Half-Birthday," or even "Here Come Saddam and Qusay."
Families would compete to see whose lawn could feature a better diorama of Uday murdering his father's food taster and personal valet Kemal Hana Gegeo by bludgeoning him to near-death with a cane and then cutting him up with an electric carving knife. The family would crowd around the television to watch the Peanuts Uday Hussein's Half-Birthday Special where Charlie Brown, in honor of Uday, would tell his football teammates that if they didn't win he would cut off their legs and throw them to ravenous dogs.

But now the Secular-Progressives are trying to ruin our glorious holiday traditions with their WOUHHB! I walked into KMart the other day and someone said "Happy Holidays" to me. I mean I really don't know if I can live in a country where someone with traditional values like mine has to feel uncomfortable celebrating this wonderful holiday openly. But there's a way out. We can fight back against the S-Ps. And with that in mind, I happily wish you and yours a MERRY UDAY HUSSEIN'S HALF-BIRTHDAY and to all a good night!