Tuesday, November 09, 2010

A la recherche du temps poo-poo

[10-Year-Old Dan is in the bathroom]

10-Year-Old Dan's Inner Monologue: Well, I have to poop and I have to take a shower. Why don't I take a shower and then poop? Then I'll feel all clean when I poop!

[10-Year-Old Dan takes a shower. He dries off, then sits on the toilet and takes a poop and starts to wipe up]

10-Year-Old Dan's Inner Monologue: That was completely insane! I just did the cleanest thing in the world and then the dirtiest thing. Ah well, life lesson learned. Poop and then shower. Better tell Rich.

[10-Year-Old Dan picks up his pants and is about to open the bathroom door]

10-Year-Old Dan's Inner Monologue: Wait a second, I'm not telling Rich. Let him figure it out on his own. I mean he doesn't tell me how he does that NHL '93 juke move to score all those goals. Screw him.

[10-Year-Old Dan opens the bathroom door. 10-Year-Old Rich is on the other side]

10-Year-Old Dan: Hey Rich, bathroom's free! You can shower, and poop. In any order you want, yep.

10-Year-Old Rich: Uh, what?

10-Year-Old Dan: Oh nothing. Doo-da-doo-da-doo

[10-Year-Old Dan walks off to read The Indian in the Cupboard but really just fantasizes about Rich screwing up the shower/poop order]

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