Sunday, July 20, 2008

Trip announcement

The splayas and I arrived for our birthright trip just now. The trip
organizer walked in and said "ok guys you're going to be meeting a lot
of new people so roll down those quarter socks!"

Friday, July 18, 2008

Commodities Bubble?

A lot of financial journalists have recently been talking about how investors may shift from the housing bubble to a new commodities bubble. They point to the recent upsurge in commodity prices such as oil. But I took a look back at commodities prices over the last three years and even projected into the next couple years using an algorithm I developed, and I'm just not seeing this bubble they're talking about. Take a look for yourselves (click on image for full view).

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

New Nostradamus Marquis Song: "Snowing in Heaven"

After a few years out of the limelight, mostly spent boozing and watching CNN's Gulf War I coverage, Nostradamus Marquis is back with "Snowing in Heaven" in response to the death of Fox News legend and former Press Secretary Tony Snow. I helped him out on the lyrics, and I plan on suing in twenty years when I'm broke and this song is bringing in megabucks on iTunes. Enjoy:

http://fliff.tv/delino/snowing_in_heaven.mp3

Friday, July 11, 2008

Scene from a New York Barbershop

Overheard at a Barber Shop on Lenox Ave:

Barber #1: Man I just got me that Netflix shit- that's some good shit right there, no more late night trips to the 'Buster.

Customer: Oh that's for DAMN sure! I got me the whole five-disc package - love that shit.

Barber #2: FIVE discs! What the fuck you need five discs for? I got two discs- that's all a brotha need.

Barber #1: Yeah - two discs! You finish one movie, you got another movie right there, you send the first one back and by the time you get a new one you done with the second. Ain't nothin' more to it than that, ya greedy mothafucka.

Barber #2: They's kids starvin' in Africa and this nigga got FIVE mothfuckin' DVD's in his crib at one time?!

Customer: Ah'm just sayin' there's situ-ations where a brotha need five discs, I mean...

Barber #1: That's it, I can't take this shit no more!

(Barber #1 takes out a shotgun and blows Customer's head off)

(Barber #1 and Barber #2 stand solemnly above the Customer's corpse)
(beat)

Barber #2 (quietly at first, then at normal volume): Hey, yo what about one of them TV shows you get really into, with all them cliffhangers and shit. Maybe you need them five discs.

Barber #1: Yeah, yeah like Lost or some shit. How the fuck you gonna stop watchin' Lost after two discs? They's too many questions- how they gonna get off that island? Who that fat dude? Shit I pulled an all-nighta at my cousin's place watchin' Season Two.

(Barber #1 looks down at corpse of Customer)

Barber #1 (wistfully): Damn, son. Mah bad...

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Wall-E Reviews

Just saw Wall-E last night and I enjoyed it, though it was not nearly as good as Ratatouille (i.e., it's not going on my Facebook list). While I was on the bus home from the movie, I whipped out my iPhone and checked the reviews on Rotten Tomatoes. Wall-E got a 97% rating, which I sort of expected; then I delved deeper and read some of the top critics' reviews. The movie was good, but these guys have perhaps gone a bit overboard - here is a sampling of some of the top reviewers:

"Wall-E is a cinematic tour-de-force. It's a masterpiece, a timeless classic. It has everything- laughter, love, and most importantly a timely message for all humanity. It takes a couple of love-struck robots to show us that if we don't stop our rampant consumerism and environmental devastation soon, there won't be much Earth left to enjoy! If you don't love this movie you have no soul."
-A.O. Scott, The New York Times

"A++++! Wall-E belongs in the Pantheon of great movies, animated or not. Beautiful cinematography, witty dialogue, and buckets full of heart. A touching tale that reminds all of us that we are at a crucial juncture in history, and humanity can either rise to the occasion or fall into an environmental abyss. Everyone will love this movie! If you don't love this movie, I fucking hate your guts. Seriously, what is wrong with you? What is going on in that diseased brain of yours- 'I don't like movies that are the most charming ever, or ones that tells us what to do to save our future'! You are the scum of the Earth do you know that, Wall-E hater? You might even be beneath cockroaches- I mean Jesus a cockroach was IN Wall-E and he was so fucking cute so yeah actually fuck that you are DEFINITELY beneath cockroaches!"
-Owen Glieberman, Entertainment Weekly

"Wall-E is the finest film ever made. It'll make you laugh, it'll make you cry, and it'll make you think with its beautiful eco-conscious message. So if you don't love Wall-E, I am going to kill you. 'Nice one,' you say? No, like, for real, I am going to kill you. I will go to your house, knock on your door, and blow your head off. No, you know what, that's letting you off too easy. First I'm going to torture you- I'll torture you so bad you'll wish you were at Guantanamo. Then I'll kill you in the slowest manner possible- maybe Braveheart style or some shit with The Rack. Matter of fact, I will kill your family too, because I don't want any of that demon Wall-E-hating seed poisoning the gene pool. In conclusion, Wall-E is an uplifting film for children of all ages, from 1-100, that will reaffirm your faith in humanity!"
-Joe Morgenstern, The Wall Street Journal

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

More Radio Content

Since so many of you liked Don't Forget the Bialys, I decided to post some more radio content. Here is the latest edition of the talk show of the Delino community's favorite waiter, Johnny from Antoine's in New Orleans. Take it away, Johnny

The Johnny Show