Indian Dad: Your mother and I are very upset with you, Anil
Indian Mom: Very upset!
Indian Dad: We have always dreamed that you would marry an Indian girl. You'd continue the bloodline, carry on the tradition passed down through generations of Indian culture. But now we learn from your cousin Chetan you're dating this Rebecca girl?
Anil: This is America, Father. I can date whoever I want to date. And I want to date Rebecca - so what if she's white? We love each other
Indian Mom: It's too much! It's too much! I need a breath of fresh air. Talk some sense into the boy
[Indian Mom steps outside]
Indian Dad: OK give it to me straight, son. What's it like to fuck a white girl? Is it everything I imagined?
Anil: What?! I thought you were angry at me
Indian Dad: No no, I just have to say these things for your mother. Now we don't have much time - tell me is the sex with the white girl great?
Anil: Uhh... I... I guess it's pretty good
Indian Dad: And does she have light pubes?
Anil: Wait - what?
Indian Dad: Light pubes - not black
Anil: Uh... I mean they're kind of a dark brown - chestnut maybe?
Indian Dad: Ohhhh the non-black pubes! What about the smell of sex with a white girl? Describe the smells for me, son
Anil: Dad, this is just - I can't tell you how weird this is! No more talk about my sex life. If you're so curious about white girls why didn't you just date one when you were my age?
Indian Dad: Are you kidding me? You think I could've just gone and dated a white girl?
Anil: Oh right - the whole arranged marriage thing
Indian Dad: No one in my generation had an arranged marriage - the problem was white girls wouldn't give Indian guys the time of day back then. Not for lack of trying on our part. But nowadays I walk down the street I see Indian guys with white girls left and right. You don't even have to be that desirable an Indian guy to get a white girl these days - no offense
Anil: I just don't see it like that, Dad. I love Rebecca, and she happens to be white. But I'd love her just the same if she were Indian or Asian or Hispanic
Indian Dad (tearing up): Oh son... that was the dream we Indian men have always had since we came to this country. Have you ever seen those immigrant pyramid murals?
Anil: Oh yeah, where at the bottom is the first generation immigrants who are farmers, then the next generation stands on their shoulders and are factory workers, and the next generation up is shopkeepers, and so on until at the top are minority doctors and lawyers and businesspeople standing on the shoulders of generations of immigrant-Americans
Indian Dad (ecstatic): Precisely! But my generation was doctors and lawyers. We need to add another generation to the top of that mural - your generation, standing on our shoulders, nonchalantly has its dicks in white women's pussies!
[Indian Mom re-enters the room]
Indian Dad: And so Anil, that is why we forbid you from ever seeing Rebecca again
[Indian Mom smiles]
[Indian Dad winks at Anil]