Friday, February 08, 2008

Huffington Post SCOOP!

The scoops just keep coming for Delino-- here is a piece that will appear on Huffington Post next week:

Richard Moll is a Los Angeles-based actor and playwright. He has appeared in countless direct-to-video horror films since his acclaimed role as "Bull" on Night Court.

It's Valentine's Day. I know, I know. I should be happy- my beautiful wife Susan and I are going to dinner at a delightful Peruvian restaurant in Westwood for ceviche. But NOT. THIS. YEAR.

How about the spouses and significant others of the 3,814 servicemen and servicewomen who have died during this illegal war? The 150,000 dead Iraqi civilians?

This isn't the Bush Doctrine, it's the Bush League Doctrine. Where were the WMDs? The only WMDs we found were Willfully Misleading Demagogues- Dick Cheney, George Bush, and Condaleezza Rice.

But no, we shouldn't talk about IMPEACHING these war criminals! Impeachment is for serious crimes, like getting a blowjob. Raping the entire Middle East with your missile-dick? That deserves merely a few negative editorials in the New York Times.

A lot of people have been talking recently about how Hillary Clinton being President would bring back all that "'90s stuff" we thought we were past. Yeah all that nasty '90s stuff like peace and prosperity! The middle class saw its real median wage climb by 30% in ten years. I saw it myself, with all those Night Court residuals coming in every month. This decade? The middle class's real median wage has actually shrunk, as have my residuals. Is it a coincidence that WGN stopped airing Night Court reruns a week after George Bush took office?

And don't even get me started on global warming! If I, with my 6'8 frame, can squeeze myself into a tiny Prius, I think those little soccer moms can switch from their SUVs. Jesus Christ, wake up and smell the burning planet, Middle America!

With two strong candidates in Hillary and Barack, it looks like the Dems are in good shape for November, but given the assclowns who run the Democratic party, you can never rule out a complete and utter collapse. And then good ol' Johnnie McCain'll be Pres-o-dent, and we'll keep slaughtering brown people in Iraq for "another 100 years!" And look out Iran, you're next- "Bomb Bomb Bomb, Bomb Bomb Iran!"

So yeah, Happy Valentine's Day.

Other Stories on Huffington Post:
LARK VOORHIES takes on Harry Reid over Telecom Immunity
JALEEL WHITE on shutting down GITMO
IAN ZIERING takes a critical look at the so-called "Social Security Crisis"


Lester said...

Brilliant. The kind of stuff that would have gotten the pre-marriage Munz wet. Lark Voorhies piece deserves publication.

The Real Ahmadinejad said...

Dear Delino,

Tanks to you from my heart.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

I'm voting for the Irish guy.

Who's that? McCain or O'Bama?

Nostradamus said...

Nice work. As Lester notes, the other pieces at the end are absolutely incredible. I nearly split my side laughing at the very mention of Ian Ziering!