The final evidence that Dan just wants to be liked (and really, who could not like Dan?):
As we were talking with the rabbi before signing the Ketubah,
he asked us if we had Jewish names. Sheepishly, we both said, "No." Surprised, but undeterred, the rabbi then asked if either of us had ever had a Bar Mitzvah. After an even more sheepish "No," Dan blurted out to the rabbi, "But maybe one day you could perform my Bar Mitzvah??"