Thursday, March 29, 2007

Another Delino SCOOP: Bush's War on Terror Speech

Our inside sources at the White House have leaked to us President Bush's newest speech about the War on Terror:

President Bush: "Some will tell you that we should retreat from the battle in Iraq. Maybe even retreat from the war in Afghanistan. (Alberto Gonzales farts) These Defeat-o-crats will tell you that if we just leave the Middle East, then the Islamofascists will all of a sudden love us. (Dick Cheney cackles, then has a stroke) Well where I'm from they got a saying: "That makes less sense than a hog knowin' how to code in UNIX."

What these people don't understand is that the Islamofascists, who encompass almost every brown skinned foreign person- not you, Dr. Sanjay Gupta, you're one of the good ones - (Dr. Sanjay Gupta "raises the roof") they hate us no matter what we do. What do the Doodie-crats think is gonna happen?

(chuckling) We stop smearing menstrual blood on their faces while they're chained to the floor and they'll be like "Oh wait, I LOVE AMERICA NOW." Or maybe we stop sodomizing their men with broomsticks, and they'll be like "UNCLE SAM, you're the greatest!" Or do the Dildo-crats think if we stop killing tens of thousands of their civilians with aerial strikes and ground fire they're gonna break out into the gosh-darned Star Spangled Banner?

Mah point is you can't reason with these people. They just hate our freedom and that's that. (Fred Barnes, who has been fellating POTUS, takes a breath to hoot and holler in agreement)


Tom said...

I like [X]o-crat jokes. More please.

Mr.Wrongway said...

POTUS always makes me laugh

the actual rod said...

this is probably better than anything i've ever written

Beneficent Allah said...

POTUS, Sanjay know how to tickle me!