Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Oh those Islamic Fundamentalists

Read this in The Washington Monthly:
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"The news [of Akhund's arrest in Pakistan] is not true," SonntagsBlick wrote. "The world press reported: top-Taliban imprisoned. At the same time he was sitting with a SonntagsBlick reporter having coffee."

It said Akhund was one of 300 people present at [an Islamic school in the southwestern city of Quetta]. He then met with the reporter and explained his future strategy in Afghanistan, the Zurich-based paper said.

According to SonntagsBlick, Akhund's "future strategy" is to kill as many Americans as possible. "We thirst for their blood," they report him saying. "Six thousand martyrs are ready to die in battle for Allah. No member of the occupying forces will be spared."

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This is a pretty amusing setup. The Taliban guy is having coffee with the reporter, and he's like "Barista, could I have a drop more steamed milk in my cappuccino? Great, thanks! ANYway, as I was saying, we'd like to kill as many Americans as possible. No member of the occupying forces will be spared. Have you seen 300 yet? The trailer looks pretty sick. I think our battle'll be something like that, you know, six thousand martyrs ready to die in battle for Allah, weapons, guts, CGI backgrounds, the whole shebang. What else? Oh, jeez, did I forget to mention that we thirst for blood? You know, hold on one sec, I just need a pinch of cinnamon."

5 comments:

The ACTUAL God said...

"ANYway, as I was saying, we'd like to kill as many Americans as possible." Top ten sentences ever.

Mulatto Jesus said...

"Thirst for blood - Bring it."

Rich said...

more Dan content.

oh, this was Dan? good.

Beneficent Allah said...

"Thirsty bitches..."

Mulatto Jesus said...

Damn, everybody's talking about this new 300 movie: Akhund, Jersey Guy #1...