Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Liveblogging the Debate 2

9:00- Tom Brokaw, Very Serious Journalist

9:03- Obama says "The economy is not doing well right now"- OOOH IT IS ON! THINGS ARE GETTING UGLY

9:05- Begala has a major boner right now- he gave Obama 2 points before Obombs even opened his mouth and now he's at 6

9:07- Mccain is supposed to do BETTER In the town hall format? Yeah showcase that robotic arm, good idea Steve Schmidt!

9:10- McCain is getting UGLY with the "Obama and his buddies in Freddie and Fannie"- IT'S REALLY ON! "Obama was loaning to his (whisper) black friends who couldn't afford to pay. (whisper ) Muslim

9:15- Even CASTELLANOS is judging McCain's performance as poor! There's an old adage in politics- "No Republican has won the election without the crucial Castellanos vote"

9:16- Rich notes Gergen has -(-2) for McCain Isn't that +2! I remember my arithmetic

9:18- Obama is being purposefully boring i think. White people love boring shit - NASCAR, mayonnaise, the suburbs. brilliant strategy

9:20- Questioner has a "t-t-t- today" moment- GAFFE!

9:21- New drinking game- drink every time McCain lifts his right arm above his arm above his head- Oh wait you won't get to have any shots!

9:22- McCain isn't moving his right arm above his head- MAVERICK!

9:23- Obama is smirking while McCain bashes him- he knows those trendlines are flatlining. Ballah!

9:24- The Straight Talk from McCain on cutting entitlements- ok don't these pols ever get it; the plebes just want to hear "energy independence" or whatever positive BS

9:25- Marty Beckerman once said "John McCain says 'my friends' alot; I think McCain belongs in the old folks home where he'll have a lot of friends"

9:27- Toobin is STINGY! So is Borger! Are they even paying attention? Are they in the CNN electrical closet doing the swing state screw

9:30- Obama drops the 9/11 bomb! Is the mention of Bush part of a brilliant subtle marketing campaign for the movie "W." which opens in theaters October 17?

9:32- OK Castellanos is at +17 for Obama, double what anyone is for anyone else! I think he senses the tide is changing in America and he wants to be a liberal commentator now. What I see is two boring dudes boring the shit out of me, but Castellanos sees a "home run" somehow?

9:35: Some guy was talking in the background- GAFFE!

9:36- Hatchet v. scalpel comparison- ahh a classic liberal meme!

9:37- McCain turns directly to Obama and says some attack line that starts "i've got news for you senator Obama"... and the trendlines flatline again

9:38- "The Straight Talk Express lost a wheel"- Obama is the next Andrew Dice Clay!

9:39- Good god this is the ugliest crowd I've ever seen in my life. Can I get the camera operators on the phone, do they know that there's a way to use a zoom lens so that the candidate is in focus and the people in the background are a blur?

9:40- What is with the Dem fetishization of the middle class? These are the people who have brought us Applebee's, Two and a Half Men and USA Today...

9:47- 5 minutes on energy and no T Boone Pickens content??? I'm disgusted

9:48- Tom Brokaw is a fucking troglodytet. He doesn't understand shit about technology or history.

9:49- McCain calls Obama "That One" oooh forget the South in 2008, it's the South in 1808 up in this bitch!

9:51- McCain is wandering around the stage like a doddering geezer- get MARTY BECKERMAN ON THE PHONE NOW FOR A GAG!

9:53- Obama mentions "you'll get a health care plan as good as John and mine have as federal employees" - jesus between that and the "we took our eye off the ball when we moved from Aghanistan to Iraq" I feel like I'm watching Kerry Deuce! What's next, "Global test!" "Tora Bora!"

9:56- when Obama said "Health Care is a right for every American," 50 million liberals just clapped in front of their TV's and said in unison in a whiny jewy voice "THAT'S RIGHT!"

9:58- Obama is talking about health care and woman are absolutely NUTTING THEMSELVES- they've been on the max level for a minute straight!

10:03- Toobin is back with a vengeance at Obama +13- he must have nutted when I wasn't paying attention and gotten back to the buzzer

10:06- McCain mentions Petraeus and trendlines dip- is it his horrible haircut?

10:07- McCain- "these times requires a cool hand at the tiller, a cool PARALYZED hand!"

10:08- McCain is wheezing- start the McCain Death Clock...

10:09- YES! Obama busts out the "Pahhkeestahn" pronunciation- Christiane Amanpour is wet right now!

10:12- Did he say Waziristan or WARIO-istan? If it's the latter i am scared! That Wario is fucking crazy! Have you seen his racecourse it's filled with pitfalls...

10:20- Begala loves the "I saw three letters in Putin's eyes- K G B" joke again; He also loves getting pounded in the ass by James Carville on the National Mall

10:23- the questions asked are so biased toward mealy-mouthed bullshit about health care and conventional wisdom foreign policy shit about "humanitarian intervention". Has Brokaw not noticed that the fucking American economy is going to shit before our eyes?

10:27- The Israel dick-sucking continues on both sides. "In terms of Iran, we'll take no options off the table"- IOZ is right they are both imperialists

10:31- Gergen has put up the fewest points of anyone. He is beating it- in a reverie about the 2nd Bush-Dukakis debate in '88...

The end- Brokaw mentions that he's reading off a teleprompter -GAFFE!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Amanpour doesn't just get wet when Obama says PAAHHKEEEstan, you could positively scoop the panty pudding out of her panties with an ice cream scooper. She loves that pronunciation like Heidi Klum loves jungle dick.

H.Bomb said...

You had me at 9:22.
(I don't watch the debates, I just read this shizz.)