Here are my prepared remarks for the big rally this afternoon:
With the election season heating up, a lot of the Coastal Elites in the Elite Media have been smearing my record as a student. A driving student that is.
Some in the Georgetown Cocktail set and the Park Avenue Matrons have been insulting me for having bounced around from "obscure" school to "obscure" school five times and barely graduating. Well as you folks know, not everyone has the means to go to the famous, tony schools like Princeton Passenger Car, Truck Driving and School Bus Academy or Stanford School of Delivery, Passenger and Ambulance Drivers.
But let me tell you something, from AutoNautics Driving School and Notary Public all the way to NY Remedial Driving Academy, back to AutoNautics, back to NY Remedial, and finally to Grand Prix Driving School where I proudly received my degree, I met some amazing folks. Folks who don't need fancy schools or arugula or martinis to feel like they're doin' something important in this country.
Folks like Tom Dominguez, who's driving a Domino's delivery car out in Flatbush, Brooklyn. Folks like Janet Heller, who drives a Domino's car out in Maspeth, Queens. And especially folks like Lamar Watkins, who is a livery cab driver... who then throws up a Domino's triangle on the car and delivers pizzas at night.
So when the Phony Elites tell you folks that they're better than you, that they know what's good for you, remember me and all the other amazing Americans who are ordinary folks doing the real work of this country and making it great.
Thank you, and God Bless you, and God Bless America.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have a 30 minute deadline to meet on this Veggie Supreme and the customer's all the way out in Prospect Heights.