Friday, April 22, 2005

Seminar Anecdote

Tonight, I eat a large dinner and run over to get to seminar on time. In seminar, I'm extremely bored and start reading some skits for Suite 13 in order to memorize them. I'm completely in my own world, and forget that I'm even in seminar. So what happens? Just when there is a lull in the class's conversation, I accidentally let out an enormous FART. Predictably, most of the class looks in my direction. At first I laugh at the absurdity of the situation, but then I decide I need to do some damage control. Fortunately, I was sitting in a wooden desk on a slick floor. So immediately, I move the desk back and forth several times, making a loud squeaking noise. I think I planted the seeds of doubt in at least some of my classmates.


the actual rod said...

what happens to me more often is the latter: my shoe, the desk, etc makes a fart noise, and then i feel the need to make it clear that it wasn't a fart, but simply a fart noise. so i try to casually make more fart noises with my shoes or the desk, and usually fail. why is this?

Anonymous said...

So I'm about to put the keys into the door of my apartment to go inside when this little love bug starts swirling arond my head. I don't want it to get inside my apartment so I think to myself, "well, this should be pretty easy to flick away..." So I smack it, but Love bugs are sticky and slow. It gets stuck to my hand and in a moment of Shakespearean justice, a line oft attributed to Glouscester rings in my head, as flies are to wanton boys, are we to the Gods, they kill us for their sport. I look at my hand and notice the love bugs yellow guts streaming down my index finger. But upon closer inspection it is apparent that little yellow eggs have been released by my smashing the bugs' thorax open. Its yellow goo is in fact its love goo. And now my finger is disgusting.

Anonymous said...

Why don't we all write some comments about the bodily functions of ourselves and insects alike? Bad post. Nobody cares.

Anonymous said...

Why don't we all write some comments about comments about posts we don't like. Nobody likes comments about comments about the bodily functions of ourselves and insects alike. Bad post to a response. Nobody cares about you not caring.

Anonymous said...

this is what happens when girls post. block their IPs. stupid love bug story.

Anonymous said...

These lovable little dipterans (they aren't actually "bugs" despite their common name) spend 5-7 months of their lives as larvae in the leaf litter. The adults emerge synchronously twice a year (April-May and September - October) and can form large swarms that cloud the air. Many people don't realize that these flies are actually invaders from Central America and have been working their way northward along the coast. They have been spotted as far north as Wilmington, NC.

If you have spotted a mating pair of these flies please send me an email at the address below stating the time and place that you saw them. We are developing a database to track this invader's northward migration and can use your help!

If you are feeling very adventurous, and wish to help my research project even more, I am looking for collections of 30+ love bugs from all over the southeast. The flies can be preserved in ethanol, rubbing alcohol or even vodka (or moonshine) and put into a small jar (baby food jars work well, as do 35mm film canisters), sealed in a small ziploc bag, and mailed to me at the address below. We will be measuring the flies to determine if body size changes from south to north, as well as their DNA.

Also, I am always interested in good photos or video footage to put on my web site.

Dr. Timothy A. Mousseau
Dept of Biological Sciences
University of South Carolina
Columbia, SC 29208

Anonymous said...


The fall 2004 emergence has started with many reports from Texas, and some are now coming in from LA and FL. Please keep sending me reports of your sightings! Thanks!

-- Anonymous Plecia nearctica lover